Sactown Rising!!

I moved to Sacramento in 2007.  April 1, 2007.  I chose to move here, from San Diego, where I had lived from 2000.  And the first thing people would say, is “Why??!!”  I wasn’t expecting that, at the time, and found myself defending this new city of mine.  Looking back on it I realize I was usually defending someone else’s hometown, to them, as they argued to me about how much it sucked.  Sacramento sucks, the Kings suck, downtown sucks, light rail sucks, blah blah blah.  I wondered, Why are you here then??!!  I don’t think I’m the only one that noticed this.  There truly was an inferiority complex pinned on the city by a lot of the people here.

Thankfully, it is finally changing.  And it is SO exciting and inspiring.

I LOVE seeing the downtown projects going up.  I’m SO excited for the new arena and the growth and redevelopment coming!  This city is awesome, and it is so underrated.  I fucking love this place and I am so happy and grateful to be here at this exact point in history to witness and be a part of the rehabilitation of a great city!!

And…Go Kings!!!!  I was at the game last night, it was so exciting!!  The energy of so many fans putting love into this team and this city…it’s contagious and it’s going to keep growing.  I just want to encourage people who live here to get on board, it’s much more fun to be supportive and positive than be a hater.  The tide is turning, be a part of it!!!  There is infinite room for everyone’s individual brand of positivity, creativity, and love in the growth of this beautiful place.  We want you!!!




Urashima Taro & Seeking Within

So I was at a children’s park in Sacramento the other day and there was a little Japanese garden area with a statue of a man sitting on a turtle’s back and there was a placard with the legend of Urashima Taro.  It caught my eye and I read it, it wasn’t that long.  The story goes that Urashima Taro was a fisherman who one day saw some children torturing a turtle, and out of compassion for the creature he offered to buy the turtle from the children and then released it.  When he was out fishing some time later, the turtle found him and spoke to him.  The turtle was a messenger from a princess under the sea, and for his kindness she had sent for him and wished for him to join her at the Dragon’s Palace, a place only known to Urashima as a myth.  But he believed the turtle and rode on his back down to the Dragon’s Palace, and it was indeed beautiful and lavish.  He ended up marrying the beautiful Princess, at her insistance,  greatly enjoyed her company, along with the beauty and riches and feasting and enjoyment all offered by this land.  At some point he felt guilty to have been gone from home, and asked to return back to his hometown to see his family.  The princess, unhappily, consented and gave to him a little box as a parting gift but instructed him not to open it, under any circumstances, unless he felt he had no other choice and no where to turn.  

When he returned to his town, he didn’t recognize the people or the buildings.  Everything had changed.  He went to where his house was, and it was a different house.  He inquired about the family of Urashima Taro.  People said that there was a legend of that name, of a man who had ridden a turtle out to sea three hundred years ago, but he thought it was not possible, it could not possibly have been three hundred years that he had been gone!  Disconsolate, with no family left in the town, nowhere to turn and no idea what to do, he opened the box that the princess had given him.  Immediately he turned old and gray, and died soon after.  For what had been in the box was his old age, for he really had been gone three hundred years, although it had only seemed like such a short time.

When I first read the story, I was a little disappointed in the ending because obviously it wasn’t a happy ending…but I also had the feeling like I just don’t get it.  What is the point?  Why does she instruct him not to open the box unless he’s in a dire situation, and then when he is, and does open the box, he immediately dies of old age?  

The placard of course didn’t have a “moral” like I am used to fables that we learned in school having.  So I have had to ponder the moral on my own, dang it!.  But after thinking about it  longer, I think the moral is all about looking inward.  We have the gifts that we need, already inside, to overcome any obstacles that may come our way.  It is when we let guilt, sadness, regret, uncertainty, or fear overcome us, and if we look elsewhere for answers, thinking that they are outside of ourselves, in some magic box…we perish.  Maybe not as dramatically as Urashima Taro did.  But it always comes back to love.  Out of love and compassion, he saved the turtle.  He was rewarded with more love, from the Princess and the Dragon Kingdom.  He loved and enjoyed.  When he became full of guilt, for leaving his family, and then fear and sadness, when he realized that so much time had passed and his family was no longer there, he became desperate.  There is no love in desperate.  There is no hope, no joy.  He went looking for that hope outside of himself, and received only more pain and ultimately, death.  

Do you feel that when you love, really love yourself and your life, you feel younger, more vibrant and radiant, and unstoppable??  When you realize that the path was always there, inside you?  When you focus on joy and love and the amazing creation that we are all a part of, don’t you feel grateful?  When you feel grateful, doesn’t that lead to more happiness, joy and love, and even greater connection with the inner guide?  After making this connection, I feel that this story is completely amazing and I can’t believe that I was led to read it at this exact time in my life.  It fits perfectly with what I have been learning about loving myself, being positive, and listening to my soul as my guide.  Seek the answers within.  My soul is pure love, and it will guide me in the best possible way, and never let me down.  I have to tune out the negative thoughts, however, to be able to hear the guide within.  It has always been there for me, no matter how much I have punished it in the past, pushing it deep down, covering it up with negative thoughts about myself, and seeking reassurance or acceptance, or love or forgiveness, from others outside of myself.

Lead with the Soul

LEAD with the SOUL.  

I let my soul make my decisions today. I quiet my mind and I listen to my soul.  

Soul, full of love, bursting with love and energy and friendship and power, show me what you want. Use my mind as your tool, rather than your enemy. Shape my thoughts as the healthiest, most inspiring and uplifting they can be.  

Soul, you are so strong. So powerful. You have the energy and power of a bright burning star, but you are as delicate as a hibiscus flower. You are beautiful in every way. You are so full of love. You are MADE of love.  

My mind cannot crush my soul. It has tried. All the doubts, fears, and the “not enough”s. They were of my mind, I know this now, because my soul is made of love, and it doesn’t think that way!  

Oh Universe, thank you for my beautiful, loving soul. Thank you for the knowledge of my soul. I was in darkness, and now I AM the light. Thank you for this amazing gift. It is the gift of love. I am humbled to know this love. I share it freely. Thank you.

A love poem to my grandmother

Hold me, rock me, teach me, love me.  

You make me feel SO loved.

You made such a difference in my life.  You were so funny, you loved to laugh so much.  You loved for everyone around you to be happy.  You loved to entertain and then sit back and watch everyone having a great time.  You loved seeing everyone relaxed and content.  And to know that they were loved.

Thank you for your warmth and your unsparing love.  I think of you all the time, especially when I’m happy and when I feel the most connected with my soul.  I think it’s because I truly felt so loved by you, and when I feel my soul, it is pure love, and it remembers you so well.  

I love you and I hope you are happy too, you have made me so happy.  Thank you with all my heart.  These are tears of joy, I promise 🙂  I rejoice in my memories and the moments when I feel close to you.  You shine so bright in my life.  Thank you.  I love you forever.

Prayer to the Universe

Thank you, Universe, for all the wonderful things you have provided for us.  Feasts for our eyes and ears.  The beauty is everywhere.  We are humbled by the magnitude, the diversity of it all.  We are humbled to be a part of it all, a universe within our own bodies.  It is amazing and we are so grateful.

The wings of my soul are opened and I take flight.

It feels so good to soar, my heart opened and full of love.

Full of appreciation for life and appreciation for the knowledge of my soul.

Thank you, Thank you, I am so humbled to have this experience.

I am overcome with joy.